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Sunday, September 13, 2009

When is taking medicine just too much? or When I finally get to Quilt

Today was the first day in seven when I was able to get up and around, even outside for a bit. I have to wonder if the meds are going to keep me stymied for another year or if my prayers for a solution to the 'very' thing that has caused this 'state of being' to be resolved will be answered, in the near future. So today I gathered the last of my postcard pieces and should be able to get the MLK cards out tomorrow. That is if I can stay up all day working. It is not an arduous task to complete the final steps rather staying up is the arduous portion of the project. Some days I am able to dream of project after project...and that is a far cry from last year at this very moment. Is it asking too much for a complete recovery with no medications necessary in order to function. Absolutely not. I feel like my Amaryllis. This is the second blooming. The first was at work when the light was poor and watering it was done a bit too much, we were just getting to know each other. I feel like that is where I am with my meds. I am using less and less and trying to find just the right amount is becoming quite a chore. If I use too much I stare at the ceiling and get little done. If I use too little I hurt all day and yet my thinking is clearer and I can imagine project after project. I am finding the middle a little better everyday. This amaryllis is in it's third blooming process for me. The first was in the winter, the second was also. But right now it is in my yard and the leaves are spread fifteen inches or more from the center...four strong leaves drinking in just the right amount of water and sunshine, breeze and shade. I watch that plant and I believe it is giving me the road to follow. Look at the fullness once the first of four bloom sprung! They are so strong and bright. Each area doing it part. Each stem strong and fit. I found just the right balance of dirt, warmth, nourishment, water, and light last winter, I will find it this fall for myself. Thank you Amaryllis for showing me the way. I do believe this plant deserves it's own quilt
Ms. V

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